When I first stepped foot onto the dating scene I told my girls every thing. EVERY. THING.
I was bombarded with never-ending questions and scenarios whenever a new prospective dude popped into place.
What's his name? Where's he from? What does he do? Do you have a pic? Are you FB friends? Is his IG private? Etc. Etc. Etc. Yadda. Yadda. Yadda.
I've learned this is a common thing with my fellow females. The moment a woman gets asked out on a date by a man her inner circle is privy to this knowledge. They are already familiar with his basic statistics and thinking about date 2, 3, 4, 5… the possibilities and the potential, their minds are racing. They get attached to their delusional ideas and hypothetical situations. This is the TRUTH.
However, in a man's mind, he simply asked this woman out on a date. No one on his end even knows she exists. He hasn't planned out the elaborate romantic love story that they are gong to tell their grandchildren someday. No. He just thought this woman was cute/hot/fuckable and hey, they're going to grab drinks at a bar and hang out. Nothing more. Nothing less.
SO WHY… Why do my fellow women go bat shit crazy every time one of our girls meets a new man? Can we all please relax? Haha.
I've recently had a conversation with a girlfriend I've met in NY, she's head over heels infatuated with a dude she met on Tinder about two weeks ago (if you don't know about Tinder, you better ask some one). She's already stressing about meeting his son and their future together. She's already spoken with her closest friends on how she's going to handle to situation. I've recently spilled to my co-worker that I'm casually seeing this dude who lives in an awesome neighborhood. I gave her the basics, she flipped the hell out with excitement, proclaiming I "better not fuck this up, because you (me) could be living in Grammercy someday."
Hold on. Geez. Take a step (or five hundred) backwards.
I promise you, I have not given up on the thought of love and marriage and happily ever afters. I'm just ultra fucking realistic these days. I am training myself to adapt a dude dating mentality, no strings, no ties and no expectations. I am doing this despite the fact that my vagina and heart are in cahoots with each other and I have the biological make up of a grown woman.
I can't invest in the ideals my girls have when I mention someone new. I'm jaded, I can't invest in these dudes in general. My walls will come down when the right man presents himself and comes correct. I appreciate the cheerleading squad, and I know us ladies feel nothing but excitement the moment one of us comes back with a juicy story and meet a potential Mr., but for the sake of our hearts, lets take it down a notch. Lets protect ourselves, because we all know how vulnerable we are.