In preparation for my newfound singledom I've been discussing deal breakers with various girlfriends. I've always kept a running list in the back of my mind, despite being married. Like I said, shit happens, and its always good to remember what you value in a potential mate/partner/whatever. The list covered some pretty standard material:

Smoking
Lacks ambition
Lives at home
Isn't able to stand up for me/himself at the appropriate times
Bad taste in music/Lacks music knowledge (this is a huge one for me, personally)

I could elaborate on each of these items individually, but that would just be me further explaining negative attributes that don't even need to be discussed. Its easy, if a man seems to be racking up too many of these—then its onto the next.

Let's focus on the deal makers. The shit that will make me take a second glance, the undercover qualities I find attractive, which I honestly haven't thought about until just recently.

1. The Art of Good Conversation

Men, if you didn't know—a lady can determine if she will take off her panties for you before you even go on your first date. No, I didn't say she will take off her panties on the first date. I'm saying we already know how far we will go based on verbal communication alone. After physical attraction the next biggest thing for me is the art of good conversation. Although I write/speak somewhat too casually at times (with slang you have to Urban Dictionary or cuss words x1,000). I like to think I have a pretty extensive vocabulary. So I take note when a guy seems articulate and uses proper grammar. You can fail super hard with me based on "your" vs. "you're" alone.

2. An Excellent Sense of Humor

My top three movies go something like this: "Superbad," "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" and "The Hangover" (disclaimer: I have a legit list too, saved for the occasions I talk to cool people and I need to sound artsy). But real talk, I have an immature sense of humor, and I embrace it. I love meeting people who find the same things I do funny. That instant click? You cannot buy that. A man has to be able to make me laugh—no question.

3. Steez

I will notice a well-dressed guy from a block away. Once I followed a guy out of the subway (going the exact opposite direction that I needed to) because I wanted to keep staring at him. Haha, yeah thats not creepy at all… Choice of clothing is only half of the equation, the other half is fit. I really want to emphasize fit, a man's clothes have to fit perfectly. If a man is looking' SHARP, thats the ultimate. Take note, he can do this in a t-shirt, denim and kicks, not sayin' he has to be suit n tied up (although, hey, that is our equivalent to lingerie). This is also a head to toe thing, a good haircut is very much necessary as well as the shoes on your feet. If I can get my nails done every three weeks, eyebrows waxed and paint my face on a daily basis then please assume that I expect a well-groomed man to accompany me. Also, I give extra points for glasses. I'm a sucker for a good pair of spectacles. Extra extra points if you can rock a clean comb-over cut with the side part, *insert heart-eyes emoticon here.*

4. Worldy-ness

Plain and simply, I want someone on my level. I'm not saying you should have already traveled the globe. But at the very least, a man should want to see the world while with me, because I don't like to stay still for very long. My general curiosity isn't always necessarily traveling, its as simple as trying Ethiopian or Moroccan food or hitting up a churrascaria cause we're craving ten different kinds of grilled meat. If Thai food is too exotic for you, or if you have a "seafood texture" thing, then thats an automatic fail for me. Deuces for sure.

5. Chivalry

I consider myself an independent woman who can hold her own, hell—I moved 3,000 miles on my own accord with savings and a single credit card in hand. However, I am somewhat backwards and old fashioned on the inside. I will always expect a man to offer to pay, hold the door, pull out my chair, etc. etc. etc, key word "offer." Make no mistake, when the check comes at the end of dinner or drinks I want to pay too, I'm just saying I expect him to beat me to the punch and refuse my card. I can take care of myself but I want to know you want to take care of me first. Bottom line—I'm just looking for a gentleman, because I know I deserve one. Once we establish that fact, I'm a lady that likes to take care of her man too.

6. Hype Seeking

I always chase hype, whether its a food fad or a new restaurant or a mixtape album drop. I have always had a thirst to know what the hell is crackin'. I hate being late to the game. I'm always tryin' to be onto that new new, especially when it comes to music. I try my best not to be pretentious about this, but I will call people out when they've been sleepin' on things they really shouldn't have. If I can find a male equivalent to my hype madness then I will never miss a thing.

Honorable mentions / extra pluses:

The ability to dance well. I consider myself to be an excellent dancer. I feel that the dance floor is the one place where I am always coordinated, otherwise I'm tripping over my own two feet or walking into walls. No joke. If you can cut a fking rug with me, particularly to a sexy ass song then we are so good.
The ability to cook. Because who doesn't love a man who can cook? I love to eat. Perfect combination.