On a whim I accepted a last min invitation to head to NYC for a wedding. I purchased the ticket as soon as my boy asked me if I wanted to attend his big day. I can be hasty like that, I’ve been extra restless lately. Plus, I’ve been meaning to head East this summer.
So I texted a dozen people that I was about to be in town. In result my trip consisted of me running around from group to group, fielding the same questions over and over again: You changed your hair? How’s life in Cali? How’s your job? How’s your apartment? Do you have roomies? Have you seen your ex? Have you seen that other guy? How are the dudes, don’t tell me there aren’t dudes?
I had the same conversation multiple times, others got less detail and some got the full scoop, depending on how well they’ve been in touch with me. I should’ve held a press conference or some shit. No joke.
By the time I completed my last catch-up session I felt extremely satisfied with my 7 month summary of life back in the Bay. Truth is when July hit I was in a major funk. I didn’t feel like I accomplished much for the first half of 2015. Why? I have no fucking clue. I am hardest on myself at all times. We’re all our own biggest critics right? Well, except when I’m not super arrogant on here. That happens frequently, you already know. I also missed certain aspects of my NY life more than I cared to admit, so I questioned my move for a quick second.
It took me multiple reiterations of: “Yeah, the hair is new. Life is good. I work at a major ad agency. I have a good title. I’m on the Visa account. My apartment is finally getting personality. I live by myself. I do see my ex, we're cool. Yes, that other guy and I are friends. The dudes are there….”
The constant repetition of facts finally got through my thick dome. So although visiting NYC felt exactly like seeing your ex the first time after a breakup, I quickly realized why I left in the first place and what kind of life I had made for myself back in SF. I failed to realize everything I had built for myself until I had to describe it to someone else.
I know I sounded questionable, fucking around with my ex that is NY, but we all know my heart was here all along. I just needed to visit an old life to see how good the new one is.