Adam always used to say that "when something doesn’t work out then the next thing will, or the next, or the one after that.” Molly and I would then jump down his throat, “Adam, that’s fate. Whatever works out is what is supposed to be.” His rebuttal was always something along the lines of a logical explanation with too many words involved. Go figure, you have two chicks trying to make sense of the world based on destiny and signs and shit vs. the mind of a male lawyer.
I guess the difference between our viewpoints is that Molly and I want to understand the process of everything while the pieces are still moving and sometimes we get attached along the way, Adam is cool with whatever he ends up with at the end of the day. He’s so fucking rational, he stays detached very well. Molly and I could never approach things so casually, we’re too busy daydreaming of possibilities and imagining the best case scenario—for everything. Our heads aren’t completely stuck in the clouds, we’re still pretty grounded, but naturally we struggle when we want something to go our way.
So in result… I hate apartment hunting… interviewing… dating… and any other anxiety causing occasion in life. It’s basically everything I’m supposed to deal within the next coming months… HAH. FUN.
Also, I’m odd in a sense where I can deal with results directly after decisions have been made (pretty immediately). I can rationalize “ok, so that didn’t work out,” but I CANNOT turn my mind off while the process is still in the works.
But que sera, sera. Right? Que sera, sera.
P.S. I wrote this because I already looked at an apartment in SF and I LIKED IT. I LIKED IT A LOT. The place has an onsite washer and dryer and the closet is fucking huge. ONSITE WASHER & DRYER THO. Ask me when the last time I had to visit a laundromat was, I can’t tell you. I honestly cannot tell you. I’ve lived in SF & NY for the past 7-8 years and I’ve never had to go to a laundromat. Also, I had no intention of even looking at apartments this soon but my boy texted me this am that his friend was looking to fill the third bedroom and next thing you know I’m arranging an 8pm walk through. GAH. DEAR MIND, PLEASE STOP SPINNING. So I desperately need some Adam perspective right now, “if this doesn’t work out, then maybe the next one or the one after that…”