In New York City there are 3 main but separate struggles:
- Finding an ideal place to live
- Finding a good job
- Dating, whether this means knowing when you're gonna get some again or trying to lock down something legit
The general consensus states that people can check off at least 2 out of 3. It's rare you're granted with all 3, and if you do have all 3—I'm betting you wouldn't mind replacing one. Guess which one I'm missing.
(This is probably applicable to where ever you reside, but since I'm in NYC I'm hesitant to generalize these observations because I feel the struggs is definitely real out here.)
During lunch one of the freelancers shared his piece on his new amazing place. He said that he's been subletting a room the size of a closet for 3 months and he couldn't take it anymore. So instead of renewing the lease or adding on another month it was time to GTFO there. He said that by the time he only had 3 days left in the room he had no real leads—even though he was actively searching. So he responded to a CL ad on a whim and there you have it... He's in love with his new spot, claiming that his karma finally kicked in. "Yo, timing is everything," he said. "I wasn't feelin' anything prior to that room and I didn't want to commit. I realize I was 3 days away from ending up couch surfing at a friend's, but I wasn't ready to just settle for anything.”
My response was as follows: "You know this basically applies to the trifecta of NY life. You could be talking about a job search or dating and the same feelings would apply."
And we all agreed. Timing is fucking everything.
This is where I needed to apply this perspective to my own personal NY struggle. I bitch and complain about the struggle of dating when in reality I really don't believe I can control anything. I'm not asking for a RomCom “Serendipity” moment, but I still feel that shit is out of my hands most of the time. Also, I'm not expecting a dude to fall out of the sky, I will seize the opportunity when I feel like it's in front of me. I have no idea when the fuck that is supposed to be, things happen for me at the absolute oddest times, so I’ll just look out for it.
But think about it... Amazing instances occur out of random decisions and by being denied other "opportunities." Had I not happily taken that cotillion spot for Iris' 18th birthday I would've never seduced Ex-Mr into being my BF (yes, I used the correct word right there). Had I not responded to that CL ad in Feb of last year I would not be living with Adam in BK right now. Sometimes you find things are "the best thing you've never had" and vice versa, and so on... And so on... And so on...
Case in point—timing is everything… as far as timing for my love life goes I guess I'm just supposed to sit around for now. FINE. I'll be patient, I'm good at that.
Clock is ticking though, and I’m tired of looking at my watch. Just saying.