I just came off a fresh FaceTime session with a few of my favorites back home. My Godsons just celebrated their birthdays last night and many of my homies stayed the night in Sacramento. If their goal was to purposely make me homesick—it worked. The boys were cooking brunch in the background while serving the ladies mimosas. Meanwhile I was here in BK, solo, drinking cold coffee while they were all enjoying each others company. Amidst the usual "when the fuck are you moving back home" interrogation, plus trying to sell me on one of their boys, I shared with them my "Good in bed" theories.

My girls are pretty much familiar and in agreement with my personal assumptions.

My two theories are as follows:

I firmly believe that assholes have a greater chance at being good in bed, at least as far as my preferences go. I've previously stated this but never explained my thinking behind it. I won't go too far into it, but I have a hard time imagining Mr. Nice guy is aggressive when I need him to be. They can always prove me wrong, but they still have to get over hurdles to get there.
If you can dance well you are more likely to be better at sex. I'm pretty sure this a universal hypothesis. This does not mean that men who cannot dance can't be good at sex, I'm not saying that. However, once I have taken interest to you and I have confirmed you are a good dancer, well then… Hi, we can test this theory out.

After my boys heard my rationale they all basically evaluated themselves (men, I freakin' swear), each claiming "Ohh, I'm a huge asshole" and danced for the webcam. I don't know why they all needed to say it out loud, they're my boys, taken by my three best girlfriends. However its true, they all have that asshole cleverness that I appreciate and yes, they have no problem on a dance floor. ALSO—girls talk, I haven't heard a single complaint from my favorite women.

Personally my numbers game is still super low to really take these theories into account. I'm proud of this, but for the most part, I have not been proven wrong.

For the record, I don't mind being proven wrong. Just. So. You. Know. ;-p